etched in sand

Voted St. Petersburg College’s 2015 One Book – One Author Selection 

After listening to Regina Calcaterra recently convey her background as an abandoned child, I understood why her Etched in Sand memoir sat right next to Maya Angelou on the New York Times Best Seller List. Despite her diminutive frame, Calcaterra is a highly influential woman. 

Etched in Sand was voted St. Petersburg College’s One Book – One College selection this year and I was privileged to spend time with the author following her presentation at the college’s Clearwater, FL campus.

Though separated from the late Maya Angelou by age, race and geography, Regina Calcaterra is emerging as a next generation icon. Like Maya, she has transmuted the isolation and trauma of her early life experience into a platform for raising America’s moral conscience. Chapter Break New Hearts

Imagine five abandoned kids growing up on Long Island as recently as the 1960s and 1970s. Regina and her siblings were products of five different fathers, all of them absent. Their mother suffered from mental illness and often disappeared, self-medicating on drugs and alcohol. A rare combination of circumstances caused the youngsters to be alone for weeks and months at a time, starting when the eldest among them was only eight. 

The five fledging children conspired at local farms and grocery stories to find food. They crafted stories to cover for their absentee mother. And they sought shelter in the public library where they had access to heat, running water and books.

Despite their horrific background, the siblings maintained a loving bond that continues to this day. All of them defied statistical expectations and grew into healthy, productive adults.

A photo of Regina and her siblings, one of several "treasures" she managed to carry with her throughout childhood.

Now a practicing attorney in NY, Regina Calcaterra stands at the forefront of a heart-centered, socially-driven movement. Her memoir is changing the way we view abandoned children and helping to inspire the idea of “forever families”– permanent, non-legal relationships for youth aging out of foster care.

Did Calcaterra ever imagine how an early life experience would culminate in her current platform as a voice for impoverished and abandoned youth? The former waif who endured shame, hunger and physical abuse told me, “It feels surreal.”

In grass roots fashion, her Etched in Sand memoir is inspiring individuals, non-profits and faith-based organizations to enlarge their hearts and galvanize their resources to help America’s forgotten and abandoned children. 

Chapter Break New Hearts

What distinguishes Regina Calcaterra as an appealing social leader is a strong constitution mixed with grace and gratitude. Regina exudes sensitivity and gentility while conveying her poignant, yet victimless, tale. She admits her childhood has dark spots, but says the story itself cannot be a dark one.  

“My goal is never to write things that would leave me or my siblings without dignity,” she discloses.  

The author is careful to conceal the identities of offensive personalities, but generous in sharing names of those who showed her kindness along the way. Her story helps us realize how even the smallest of gestures can infuse strength to the soul of a needy recipient.

She shares about the crossing guard who taught a young Regina how to blow her nose. We join Regina for a weekend sleepover at a classmate’s home and feel the love of a mother who washed her dirty clothes, provided her a warm shower and gifted her with a toothbrush before she left. Later on, we’re inspired by the vocational school teacher who encouraged Regina to apply to college.

Each illuminated figure in Regina Calcaterra’s life brings us into intimate relationship with the author’s personal experience. We recognize how kind acts can be a beacon of hope, direction and support to a faceless human languishing on the fringes of society.  

St. Petersburg College’s Bobbi Cullinan helped bring the author to Florida and organize the four campus speaking engagement. “Regina’s story is now part of the legacy of St. Petersburg College,” she told me. The Senior Administrator Services Specialist is looking forward to hearing how SPC students, staff and faculty will find ways to respond to the author’s message.

SPC business student Bethany Flick conveyed one immediate impact. Flick had previously volunteered at a homeless shelter but admitted that hearing the author provide a first person narrative changed her perspective. “I never thought about what (these individuals) are going through on a daily basis. All of us here at college never think, what if it’s our classmate?  We need to reach out to them.”

For Regina Calcaterra childhood might have begun as one etched in sand, but expect her to carry a legacy etched in stone. As author, attorney and spokesperson for abandoned children, she’s mining an intimate place in the American culture where connections of the heart are converting into acts of human kindness. 

Maura Sweeney in Ulcinj Montenegro

Maura Sweeney is a Podcaster, Author and Speaker

Her mantra is “Living Happy – Inside Out!”

Find her podcasts on iTunes and Stitcher

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